When you’re looking for enthusiastic consent from your partner, here are some things to keep in mind:
- A lack of a ‘no’ doesn’t mean ‘yes.’
- ‘No’ is not a challenge to overcome. When unsure of your partner’s response, ask.
- Resorting to manipulation, “wearing down” your partner, or waiting until he or she stops saying ‘no’ is not enthusiastic consent.
- Never have sex with someone whose freedom of judgement is impaired. A drunk person who is unconscious cannot actually consent to sex. If your partner is too drunk to consent, back off.
- No matter how long you’ve been together, show respect for your partner. If you want to and he or she doesn’t, back off.
- Flirting, dancing, kissing, an invitation back to a bedroom…none of those equals consent to sex. If your partner says no to sex and you don’t stop, that’s rape.